Health warning: laughter could leave you in stitches

It is said laughter is the best medicine, but research has shown a sudden fit of the giggles could be bad for health, leaving some people literally in stitches.

A study of the reported benefits and damage of laughter in patients from 1946 to the present day found a loud guffaw can causing heart rupture, torn gullets and incontinence.

Researchers from Birmingham and Oxford universities concluded laughter can have serious health implications.

One woman with racing heart syndrome collapsed and died after a period of intense laughter and laughing 'fit to burst' was found to cause possible heart rupture or a torn gullet.

A quick intake of breath during laughing was also discovered to often cause inhalation of foreign bodies and can also provoke asthma attacks.

Bursts of laughter were also proven to cause incontinence and trigger hernias.

However the review found that chuckling can also have a positive impact in health.

Laughter reduces arterial wall stiffness, which researchers suggest may relieve tension. And it lowered the risk of heartattack.

Hospital clowns improved lung function in patients with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease and 'genuine laughter' for a whole day could burn 2000 calories and lower the blood sugar in diabetics.

Laughter also enhanced fertility: 36 per cent of would-be mothers who were entertained by a clown after IVF and embryo transfer became pregnant compared with 20 per cent in the control group.

The researchers say that their review challenges the view that laughter can only be beneficial but do add that humour in any form carries a "low risk of harm and may be beneficial".

They conclude that it remains to be seen whether "sick jokes make you ill, dry wit causes dehydration or jokes in bad taste cause dysgeusia (distortion of sense of taste)".

“We categorised the effects as beneficial or harmful, a usually clear-cut distinction. Some effects, however, such as lowering the threshold for seduction, could not be unequivocally categorised,” said the authors.

“Some readers may ignore the benefits of laughter. That would be serious. Others may dismiss its harms. We call them the laughing cavalier.”

The findings were reported in the BMJ Christmas edition.

A swimming pool is evacuated after an artificial leg is mistaken for a paedophile

Artificial leg prompts ‘paedophile panic’ at swimming pool and evacuation of children

An entire class of primary school children was evacuated from a swimming pool – because a prosthetic leg sticking out from underneath a cubicle was thought to be a paedophile.

The alarm was raised when staff noticed the foot poking out as the eight- and nine-year-olds got changed following a swimming lesson.

Teachers immediately took the children out of Larkfield Leisure Centre in Aylesford, Kent, but were stunned to discover that the foot was actually part of a prosthetic leg.

Karl Lagerfeld: I want to marry my cat

Designer Karl Lagerfeld has declared that he wants to marry his pet cat Choupette.

The eccentric creative director of Chanel said the one-year-old white Siamese cat was his most prized possession.

Choupette has its own staff, including three maids who are tasked with noting down everything the feline does while Largerfeld is away from their home in Paris so that he can check up on how his beloved pet is spending its time.

"There is no marriage, yet, for human beings and animals… I never thought that I would fall in love like this with a cat," Lagerfeld told CNN's Fashion Week: Backstage Pass.

When asked if the cat flies by private jet, Largerfeld said: "Yes, why not?"

Choupette is well known among fashion circles. As well as its own maids, the cat has 27,000 followers on Twitter. It has its own pillow and dines with Largefeld twice a day, eating food that has been specially prepared.

Female clubbers complain about two-way mirror in ladies

Complaints from female clubbers that a two-way mirror in the women’s lavatory of a Glasgow nightclub allows male guests to spy on them are being investigated by police and licensing officers.

The feature at The Shimmy Club apparently allows women to be watched while they are using a row of sinks.

The mirror, similar to those used by police when interviewing suspects, is between the lavatory and a function room rented to private parties at a cost of £800.

A spokesman for Glasgow Licensing Board said: "Complaints have been received about these premises and licensing standards officers are currently investigating." Police Scotland also confirmed that it was investigating.

Drew Smith, a Glasgow MSP, said he had written to the city council to ask if licensing provisions had been broken, adding: “I think most of us find the concept of a voyeur toilet disturbing. I would urge the management of this club to board it up and show their customers some respect.

“Women using a washroom should not have to worry about whether they are part of some kind of bizarre peep show."

The G1 Group, which runs the club, posted a message on its Facebook page stating that the mirror was a design feature created as “a bit of fun”.

It said: "The vast majority of people who have visited the club have taken it as such. Its clear that those who are negatively commenting online may not have been lucky enough to get past the door staff yet and viewed the area.

"There has always been signage in the toilets but as a result of media feedback clearer signage has been put in place.

"We are committed to listening to you guys who are our core customer base. So if your feedback is that you want the mirror area to change then we will listen."

One customer called Amy complained about the mirror after visiting the club to celebrate her birthday. She said she saw men in booths adjacent to the mirror “making gestures”.

She added: "Nowhere is it made clear that this is the case, so when visiting the bathroom for the first time, there are women bending over the sink, pouting into the mirror to redo their lipstick, adjusting themselves personally whilst unknowingly being watched by people on the other side.”

She received an email reply from the nightclub operator which said a small disclaimer was printed on the mirror to warn that two-way glass was fitted.

The response added: "Firstly can I apologise that you have been offended, this is 100 per cent not our intention at all. The mirror detail in the ladies' toilet was put in as a talking point, only the ladies at the sinks can be seen, there is another mirror behind the wall for people to use who don't like the one at the sinks.

"I can assure you that if there was any behaviour deemed sexist or immoral or anyone was leering or making inappropriate gestures we would remove them from the club, and if necessary call the police.

"There is a small disclaimer on the mirror, however I will also look at making that bigger. We also have a toilet attendant who advises the ladies about the mirror. To date you are the first complaint, everyone else so far has seen it as we intended, as a bit of fun.”

Australian fisherman spends night with crocodile below bunk

An Australian fisherman was so enraged with finding yet another crocodile on the end of his fishing line that he took the animal home and spent the night with it sleeping below his bunk bed.

Ashley Sala with the 2 metre crocodile that became tangled in his lines while fishing at Ninds Creek, Australia

Ashley Sala spent his birthday fishing at Ninds Creek, in the river mouth at Innisfail, 55 miles south of Cairns, when he thought he'd caught a fish.

"I threw my line out to catch a barra for my birthday and I ended up catching a croc," Mr Sala said.

"I thought I'd caught my one-metre barra. I was so happy, I was yahooing and carrying on.

"Twenty minutes later after fighting it I brought it to the surface and when the moon came out from behind the clouds I realised it was a croc tangled up in my fishing line."

Mr Sala realised the crocodile – which he was "starting to feel sorry for" – would almost certainly drown if the line wasn't untangled. And so, maddened at the frequency with which the crocodiles were stealing his bait, he picked up the reptile, taped its jaws together, and drove it to the house of his local councillor to complain about the crocodile population.

The only problem was that the councillor, Mark Nolan, also in charge of the county's crocodiles, was asleep.

"I went around to Mark Nolan's house because I know where he lives," Mr Sala said. "I was a bit hyped up and shouldn't have been there trying to wake him up but I was sick of going fishing and having this problem with crocodiles."

So the fisherman then decided to take the crocodile home for the night until it could be taken to a wildlife park. His unimpressed girlfriend made the pair sleep in an empty "donga" – cabin – at his family's caravan park.

"I sat on the top bunk and had a few birthday beers by myself and watched the croc on the floor until I fell asleep," he explained.

His councillor later praised Mr Sala's care of the animal, comparing him favourably to Crocodile Dundee actor Paul Hogan.

"Paul Hogan's got nothing on Ashley Sala," he said. "Paul Hogan never slept with a saltie. Ashley has, and I witnessed it.

"So I give Ashley a 10 out of 10 for the way he cared for the reptile during the night and now it's been relocated and it's safely back in a crocodile farm."

Metal body parts recycled after cremation

Metal body parts are being recycled into road signs, lamp posts, car parts and aircraft engines after people are cremated.

The metal parts of hip replacements, like those pictured, are amongst the parts collected and recycled after a person is cremated 

The project has raised almost £1million for charity since it began in Britain in 2004.

Steel hips, plates and screws from legs and skulls are collected after a person is cremated and sent off for recycling.

Even metal plates from false teeth and tiny fragments from fillings can be recovered and re-used, together with metal fittings on coffins.

High value metals which survive the 1000-degree cremation are then sold for use in the automobile and aeronautical industries.

They include cobalt and titanium, found in some implants and dental work. Cobalt is used in aircraft engines.

But other less valuable metals are smelted down and sold for more general use - including road signs, motorway barriers and lamp posts.

The salvaged metal from cremations is put in large wheelie bins and collected by contractors who take it to specialist plants for recycling.

The Dutch company behind the recycling says around half Britain's 260 crematoriums have signed up to the scheme which is generating 75 tonnes of metal a year.

Relatives are asked if they want to keep metal parts of loved ones before cremations by the centres taking part in the scheme.

The vast majority say they have no need for them and sign a consent form agreeing to the recycling.

When the cremation is over the ashes and other remaining items go into a compartment in the cremator and then into a special cremulator machine which separates any metal from remaining pieces of bone.

One of the crematoriums in the scheme is at Weston-super-Mare in Somerset which has an average of four-five services a day.

Around one large bin a month is filled with the unwanted metal body parts for recycling.

The crematorium at Haycombe in nearby Bath has around 2,000 cremations a year and also recycles unwanted metal body parts.

A spokesman for the council-owned crematorium said: "We subscribe to a not-for-profit recycling scheme for all metals recovered from the cremation process.

"Applicants may opt to retain the metals but they must take them away and they cannot be returned afterwards."

The recycling schemes are governed by strict criteria set down by the Institute of Cemetery and Crematorium Management.

Bristol City Council, which operates two cemeteries, is considering joining the scheme.

Currently metal body parts are buried in the grounds of the crematoriums, but new legislation means this will no longer be possible.

Ruud Verberne, owner of OrthoMetals, the Dutch company behind the recycling, said: "Metals reclaimed from cremations are being increasingly re-used.

"High value metals such as cobalt go into the aircraft or automotive industries.

"Others are sold to smelters and foundries and it is possible that they end up as roadsigns or motorway barriers - there's no way of knowing.

"What is important is that the metals are being recycled, and this is a growing business both in Britain and elsewhere in Europe."

Men take six months to do 'little jobs' around house

The typical man takes six months to get around to all the 'little jobs' in the house, new research has revealed.

A study found a lack of time, knowledge or enthusiasm is often the reason for the failure to carry out tasks such as repairing squeaky floorboards, replacing light bulbs, and hanging pictures.

Other jobs which regularly wait six months or more include cleaning stained carpets, touching up paint and mending leaking taps.

A spokeswoman for Homebase, which commissioned the study among 2,000 homeowners, said: "We all have 'little jobs' that we put off around our homes.

"These can appear quite daunting and overtime could lead to more serious problems.

"Knowing how to tackle them is key to staying on top of things, and can mean they take little time and effort to put right.

"It's understandable that many people are unsure how to fix certain little problems that crop up in the home and the best way to build your confidence is to seek advice and practice.

"The potential cost of a project can put property owners off too, but fixing problems early mean they won't cost as much as many of us would expect."

Researchers also found 41 per cent of Brits put off their home improvement tasks because they don't know how to do them.

British homeowners have confessed to not knowing how to do some of the smallest jobs around the house.

Mending a squeaky floorboard, a dripping tap or exposed wires leave many of us scratching their heads.

Fixing a broken TV aerial, broken window panes are also thought of as 'difficult' while cracked tiles have one in ten people searching for help.

The cost of a job can also leave Brits cowering, as homeowners are looking at spending around £244 to complete all the little jobs which currently need addressing.

It also emerged in the past 12 months, the average household has already spent £190 on home improvements.

Despite all the tedious tasks waiting to be completed, 46 per cent of people said their house was still 'home sweet home'.

Four in ten said they would describe their home as tidy but tired.